14/04/2012Why American Men are Not Depressed

  WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:    Men Are Just Happier People --  What do you expect from such simple creatures?  Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack... You can be President.  You can never be pregnant.   You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.   Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station   restroom  because this one is just too icky.  You don\'t have to stop and think of which way to   turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. T...

05/04/2012The Chinese make a Few Small Changes to Fast Food Companies

05/04/2012Mother's Milk

  VERY INGENIOUS YOUNG MAN!!   Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam.    The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk', worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages. He wrote:   1) It is perfect formula for the child. 2) It provides immunity against several diseases. 3) It is always the right temperature. 4) It is inexpensive. 5) It bonds the child to mother, and vice versa. 6) It is always available as needed.   And then the student was stuck. Finally, in  desperation, j...

04/04/2012Political Thoughts for an Election Year

  Thoughts for an election year:   We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. ~Aesop, Greek slave & fable author     Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber. ~Plato Greek Philosopher     Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river. ~Nikita Khrushchev, Soviet politician     When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become P...

04/04/2012Montana Department of Labor Research

  The Montana Department of Employment, Division of Labor Standards claimed a small rancher was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him. GOVT AGENT: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.  RANCHER: Well, there's my hired hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board. Then there's the mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.  GOVT AGENT: That...